sounds like you mean it if you did twice
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sounds like you mean it if you did twice :) so I think you know what you wanted in this situation. This has been a long, hard road for you. I am sure there are many more things to be dealt with and decided upon, but for now, it sounds like you reached some decisions that have brought you into the realm of self-care. Perhaps you will breath a little easier now, be more present for yourself and your children.